External grasping. I was a champion at this once upon a time, and I admit if I’m not mindful, I can lose myself for hours in all the information available online. It’s just so appealing, right?
Through this topic of recurring questions, you should now be gaining valuable insight around patterns of thoughts and behaviours that you may be engaged in. External grasping is another good one.
We’ve got Google, apps, social media, books, articles, doctors, practitioners, workshops, health retreats, yoga and the rest – there is no shortage of information or help out there that we engage with every day. It’s evident that we are seeking for something more.
Grasping though has a different feel to it; it comes from a place of fear.
Two things happen when we grasp:
- We clutch at something outside of us
- We abandon ourselves
WHERE TO TURN
When clients tell me they feel lost, that they don’t know where to turn, I know they have abandoned themselves in the process. I am sometimes the next best thing they are grasping for, and that’s why I do my best to bring them back to themselves.
Last week I talked about the generic medical system and the process that too often happens in your quest to overcome these gut symptoms. You get thrust in to a process without much consultation, and it’s fair to say, that system has it’s own wheels. Don’t blame yourself if you’ve been in it or are currently there. Your power now is being aware of it and making choices that expand rather than contract you.
We live in an age where we are encouraged to gather more information. And what’s worse is the constancy of technology, which means we don’t need to retain any information, nor do we need to exercise much resilience or patience because everything is available at all times. Resilience and patience ask us to reach down deep within ourselves, to find acceptance and tolerance in difficult situations; it’s quite the contrast to external grasping.
We get a hit of adrenaline and dopamine when we find what we are searching for. You can see then how today’s society moves us away from ourselves and rewards us for finding an answer somewhere out there. We repeat it because it feels good and we perceive we are making progress; it’s like a little teaser each time. Information is exciting and fun and has a lot to offer us towards our growth and fulfilment, but remember, when we abandon ourselves in the quest, we’re in trouble.
WHY WE ARE IN A BOOM
In the health and wellness field, there is an endless supply of information and advice. We are so far out of balance that the health and wellbeing field has organically boomed to respond to those imbalances. It’s a good response to a problem, but maybe we could prevent it in the first place.
Health and wellness a growing field because more people are searching outside of themselves to resolve those internal imbalances. If you compare our lives to just 20 years ago, you’ll observe how much more complex they’ve become. I would welcome back the 80’s in a heartbeat.
Lets use dietary interventions as an example. Now I’m all for seeing a dietitian or nutritionist or naturopath if something has gone pear shaped or you’re looking for something better. It’s valuable to get experts eyes on the situation, as long as we simultaneously look inwards. The problem comes when we completely hand over agency to another and forget to listen to our needs and what agrees with us. In other words, don’t just “follow” a diet, feel it. You be the guide on how your body feels when you eat certain foods, not the cookbook or practitioner. We must listen inwards just as much, if not more. If not, our body will contract, and contraction means stress which equals more symptoms.
All good interventions should bring you back inwards, and next week I will tie the whole recurring questions topic together when we investigate and practice “coming home” – using intuition and instinct which if we listen carefully, is always right.
I believe in you.